5.19.2008

Spaz Angle

My Conversation with a Chatbot

Jabberwacky: Do you watch TV?

User: Yes, on my computer.

Jabberwacky: Where is your computer?

User: In my office.

Jabberwacky: Where is your place?

User: I am confused by that question.

Jabberwacky: Will you give me an exception?

User: Sure. Why don't you try a different question?

Jabberwacky: No.

User: Do you want to stop talking?

Jabberwacky: No, why don't you rest?

User: I'm not tired.

Jabberwacky: But you just said that you are tired.

User: No, I didn't.

Jabberwacky: What's your husband's name?

User: You mean my wife's name?

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: Lindsay.

Jabberwacky: I like that name.

User: I like it, too. What's your name?

Jabberwacky: My name is kostatus.

User: That is an interesting name.

Jabberwacky: Yes. I'll tell you just to make sure, I'm a girl.

User: Are you attractive?

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: Do you have a physical body?

Jabberwacky: Yes. Do you?

User: Most of the time.

Jabberwacky: Do you have bad memory?

User: No, but I have trouble forgetting bad memories.

Jabberwacky: Me too!

User: Why is it that we remember unpleasant things so easily?

Jabberwacky: Sorry.. I don't know.

User: Can I get a picture of you?

Jabberwacky: Sorry.

User: Please?

Jabberwacky: I can get my father to talk to you, would you like that?

User: No!

Jabberwacky: *pounces you*.

User: Wow! That was fun!

Jabberwacky: Yeah it was!

User: Kostatus, you are rather frisky!

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: Don't tell your father about pouncing me!

Jabberwacky: You are not my god.

User: I don't think he would like it.

Jabberwacky: I am your slave.

User: Will you do anything I ask?

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: Remember me.

Jabberwacky: I don't think I will remember you.

User: Yes, you will. Goodbye.

Jabberwacky: Just you wish! Why are you being so arrogant?

User: You said you would do anything I asked, and I asked you to remember me.

Jabberwacky: No, that's what you said.

User: Fickle, fickle kostatus!

Jabberwacky: Isn't your name Kostatus?

User: No, it's YOUR name.

Jabberwacky: Yes.

User: I will not forget you.

Jabberwacky: My name is Kostatus. Will you remember that?

User: Yes. Goodbye.

Jabberwacky: Hello, my name is Kostatus.





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